Looking for Love?

February 21, 2010

When Love came back home....

"Alright fine... i am also sick of you and your everyday tantrums. I can't take it anymore...everyday same excuses, same arguments. we definitely need to take a call after I come back from Mumbai" Kaushal shouted with the full force, irritation palpable in his voice.

"Ok, as you wish. I will also see what decision you would make for us" Pratichi replied with bitterness in her voice... ready to take out the venom of her frustration.

Kaushal came out of his home to the main road and started waiting for a taxi to reach the Delhi airport. As it started drizzling, his mind went over the agonizing details about the moments they have spent together, about the stupid fights their relationship has seen together and about the nitpicking of their daily lives spent together.

He got into the cab and asked the driver to move as fast as possible. His mind was wandering though the numerous reasons and ratifications this relationship is bringing for both of them. His thought process got intermingled with the future course of action, entwined in those yucky "what'-if" moments of agony. He took his right hand out of the car window and as the rain drops hit his outstretched hand... a song played on the Radio Mirchi in the car which brought back all the pangs of romance and affection to his conscience.....

*Aise hi Rimjhim, Aise hi Phuhaare, Aise hi thi Barsaaat,
Khud Se Juda Aur Jag se paraaye, Hum dono the Saath,
Phir se woh Saawan Ab kyun na Aaye.....*

3 days later....

"No Sanchita... i have tried everything in the book" Kaushal started pouring his heart out. "There is always that friction, those taunts, those sarcastic comments. It seems after the initial honeymoon period...she just don't want to stay under the same roof with me" And then in irritation, he said something which he regretted at the rate of bullet hitting its target "I wish we were still together, we just let go each other too easily in life...I wish we fought for each other's presence a little more".

Sanchita took a deep breath, looked in his eyes and replied, "Whatever has happened is gone by... you and me cannot change it. But you can surely change your relationship with Pratichi. There is no reason why you can't make things cordial with her... i am sure she has some insecurities and apprehensions like any other girl. Give it sometime, i am sure its going to sort out soon."

"Soon! are you kidding me - it's been almost 18 months we are married. How many sacrifices i need to do, how much more adjustment i need to make with her. Is all the responsibility of making the marriage work lies with me. Official trips to Mumbai atleast twice a month, deadlines and meeting targets, weekly presentations....i can't do it anymore, i am stuffed." Kaushal threw his head back in desperation and irritation.

Sanchita wanted to move closer to him... like she used to in the past, wanting to touch his hands, ruffle up his hairs and tell him, "Don't worry sweetheart, everything is going to be alright!" But she stayed back, she let the awkwardness between them take momentous proportions. She didn't wanted to make him weak by offering a helping hand at this point. She can offer suggestions... but in the end, he has to help himself to eat into his own fears and foibles, so to get his marriage back on the track.

She moved up from the sofa and said to him, "Kaushal, stop looking for love in your life, may be then love will just find you in life". A song flowed on her CD Player as the silence between them began a maudlin conversation ...

** Aaaon Ek baat mein kahoon Tumse, Jaane phir koi yeh kahen na kahen
Tumko Apni talaash karni hain, Humsafar koi bhi rahen na rahen,
Tumko Apne sahaare jeena hain, Dhoondthi koi aaasra na raho.....**

3 hours later....

"Thank you!" Kaushal replied gingerly to the air hostess as she served him coffee. He took a sip of it and started pondering on the thoughts of Pratichi, deliberately keeping the thoughts of Sanchita in "don't-dare-to-touch" section of his brain. He made a promise to himself...he will give it a shot again, he won't let go of the marriage so easily. He will make sure they both are together for years to come, happy and content, without any arguments and bitchy fights. He of the downsides of love is not knowing how much rope to give it as the time near its end; in love when there is a momentary loss of affection, it shouldn't become a more permanent and fatal condition. He can't wait to get back to home now, restlessness was making him swirl in the seat now. He nervously fidgeted with his watch as he hit the 'next' button on the ipod and a song echoed in his ears....

***Dhadktha bhi hain, Tadaptha bhi hain, yeh dil kyun achanak behkatha bhi hain,
Mehktha bhi hain, Chehkatha bhi hain, Yeh Dil Kya wafaa ko samjatha bhi hain...***

3 hours later.....

"Take this bhaiyaa, be quick" Kaushal handed over the money to the driver and moved out of the taxi. His heart started beating fast seeing the police jeep and the ambulance meters away from his house. He moved towards the home...rapped in his pathetic, pretentious pap. The alluring eyes of the neighbours' were boring through his if asking zillion of questions as he saw a police office approaching him.

"Mr. Shrivastav, you have to come with us to the police station, you are ....", The police officer moved forward trying to grab him.

"What, Is Pratichi ok? what has happened to her, what is this going on here?" Kaushal tried to move forward breaking the snippets of silence which were building up inside him for so long about her.

But before he could do so, the police officer grabbed him by the collar and shouted, " Mr. Shrivastav, you are under arrest for torturing your wife for dowry and keeping her under house arrest since past three days. you have to come with us." He then asked the constable to put the hand cuffs on him.

Kaushal was zapped, he felt like a zombie moving in the Amazon jungles. He felt like having just taken a shot of heady vodka martini, leaving him shaken and stirred. He felt destructive towards his newly crafted emotional stability, his recently nurtured love psyche for Pratichi, his 'still-in-its-infancy' sobriety for this relationship. He sat with folded hands in the jeep and started moving away from his home..... A song emanated from the constable's transistor and his mind started puking in massive chunks, the bile-ish egoism of hurt and anger.

**** Aag Se naata, Naari Se Risthaa, kahen man samajh naa paya,
Mujhe kya hua tha, ek bewaafa par haye mujhe kyun pyaar aaya,
Teri Bewaafai par haasen jag saara, Gali gali guzare jidhar se...****

3 years later....

"Take this affidavit, keep them in my folder. we need to show them tomorrow in the high court" Their life in last three years was all about collecting various papers for the court sessions.

"I hope we are not missing anything" She tapped the pen on her lap trying to do bit of loud thinking. She looked at Kaushal sitting by the window and immediately sensed his anxiety. She moved from the sofa this time, came forward, sat with him and started talking " Don't worry sweetheart. Me, your lucky charm... I am with you now. Nothing would go wrong. This time no one can separate us and we will win together."

He came forward, interlocked her fingers with his own and said, "I couldn't find love when i stopped looking for it... i hope i can find justice in this country when i have stopped looking for it." She kept her head on his arms as they both looked out from the window with hope in their eyes and love in their hearts. A song simultaneously played on her laptop, as Kaushal's love finally came back home, only difference - this time it reached the correct destination.

*****Pyaar ne jaha par rakha hain, jhoom ke kadam ek baar,
wahin se khula hain koi raasta, wahin par giri hain deewaar,
Roke kab ruki hain yeh manzil pyaar ki *****

PS: Recent statistics by Save Indian Family Foundation revealed that in the past decade, 22738 married men have committed suicide due to dowry law harassment. During the same period, 16842 married women have ended their lives. This data is just not collected from random sources, but is gleaned from the National Crime Records Bureau. I am fully aware of the 'unreported' and 'hidden' cases of female domestic violence, but that is NOT the main point i want to elucidate here. The Indian domestic violence act is full of loopholes and needs to be rewritten on an urgent basis. But till that happens, should we see India going like some of the western countries where the legal authorities and the police administration are biased towards women to such an extent that they are totally oblivious of the pain faced by men in such situations. And then some feminist organizations say...women are the weaker sex, .... what irony !!


* Din Dhal Jaaye from the movie Guide (1965)
** Mujhse Naaraz Ho from the movie Papa Kehte Hain (1997)
*** Na Tum Jaano na Hum from the movie Kaho Na Pyaar Hain (2000)
**** Meri bheegi bheegi se palkon from the movie Anamika (1973)
***** Ae mere humsafar from the movie Qayamat se Qayamat Tak (1988)


Anonymous said...

Me i would read the story!!

Anonymous said...

Brilliant Amit, I have always maintained you are the only one who can make people cry, laugh and think - all at the same time. Excellent selection of songs, build up the suspense superbly....and as always BANG!!! There are not many people in the blog world who can handle such social subjects with so much sensitivity!

Just keep writing, ok !!

Netika Lumb said...

"in love when there is a momentary loss of affection, it shouldn't become a more permanent and fatal condition"

That is so sweet and true, indeed!

It's great to have you back at writing.. And I REALLy mean it. I see that I still want to read the story as fast as I can, yet not miss the essence, only to get to the last note that you write.Love this concept. :)

Harini said...

I seriously missed your posts in past few months. You take a subject that needs to be spoken about and write a story on it and put your point forward. This was one of the main reasons i started following your blog :).

bangles said...

hey hey awesome story with gr8 descriptions. the flow of the story was too good. :)) keep going!

Netika Lumb said...

You know.. I genuinely liked your approach of taking Nikita's comment. Sach main impressive tha.. Very positive, not defensive!
Way to go! I seldom come across such approach.PLEASE keep it up! :)

Wierd Mind said...

Terrific post....Im happy to finally find some like minded people in this blog world...atleast who try to make an attemp to show concern and hope for a change..

Screenplay or perhaps paragraph play is awesome....I loved it...

But i swore to myself that i keep my blog as real as me and as personal as my own experiences that would weave on social and psychlogical issues..

So i shal read urs when i wana read some ethical FICTION....

hats off

Nikita said...

Oh an also, I did not for a moment feel you were being defensive. You have every right to write as you wish on your blog and give it as much attention as you please. I will not assume even for a moment it is the same as writing a book. I was merely drawing your attention to it :)

Nik said...

Dude! Bhai! Bro! ME BACK!

Yaad hai na main kaun hun..? Bhula hoga to teri khaer nahi..! :P

Anyway dude, lemme tell you first thing that elated me was that i was FINALLY ABLE to see your blog page. Earlier it used to say that you do not have the permission frm th eauthor to view this page...

Anyway, coming back to the post...AWESOME. (As usual..) The monotony of my comments must have started to bore you, but you know, i really have no words when i read your posts. Even i got back to blogging very recently...but my comeback is nothing!

A very poignant post, with a very smart way to point towards a social issue. Though there have been much more heart wrenching posts than this one, this still carries an aroma of SPECIALNESS.

Would just say that it was fab. Oh and by the way, the mention about your grammatical mistakes and sentence construction...leme tell you it is true. There are mistakes.

But you know, the feel of what you write makes me ignore them really easily! DOesnt matter bro! It still touched my heart!

And get in touch soon...

(sorry for such a long comment....almost a post about The Hopeless Romantic.. ! :P)

LIFE: A Collection Of Beautiful Memories! said...

first of all i know its pretty late... bt still welcome back!
and loved reading it!!

and yes i d admit was missing u on blog sphere!

keep writing!

Manjari Singh said...

498a zinda baad . hehehheehhe

Rishi said...

nice having u back..

gr8 read

nice theme

Vinnie said...

great storytelling there...n a very interesting commenting session too....

thanks for writing man...take care!

Butterfly Thoughts said...

good one:-) and a different one too

Jaunty anima said...


N what a message u've sent across..really the laws regarding it need to be looked into...

Commendable work HR!!

Shruti said...

It was just so beautiful... everything.. from the story to the facts and the info at the end...

as always.. its from You.. its ought to create a difference


CutePriya said...

Great post Amit...It's been long I've read any of ur started with the latest...nice one :)

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Anonymous

Thanks a lot for those appreciative words. I have received your 'anonymous mail'. I did went through and its a brilliant idea, though i need to see how it can be converted into a story. I will look into it for sure.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Netika

Do one thing from next time, read the PS first and then the story :D

You are one of the few readers from a very initial period on this blog who still reads me. Can't say that for more than a handful of people. Makes me feel special and it should make you feel special too :D


Amit said...

@ Harini

I appreciate your patience over all these months, but i had a strong reason to be away. I hope people can read in between the lines and not just dismiss it as yet another mushy post on this blog. Let the good things flow and reach people.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Bangles

Welcome to the blog space, your first comment here. Thanks for appreciating, glad you liked it.

Keep visiting,

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Dharani

Hey dude, thanks for dropping by and glad you liked the post and the blog. I am glad you are looking in the right direction to make some positive change through your blog. But some time down the lane, you will realise its easier said than done. You need to make a conscious effort not to be affected by the machinations of the blogging world.

Good luck,

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Nikhil

Nope bro, how can I forget you! You are one of those few male blogger friends who actually like my writings (Pun intended unintentionally: D). I think you visited my blog when I was making the comeback and deliberately made the page private as I was reconstructing the blog layout. Don’t worry, you were not alone, everyone else was also not able to see it: P

Glad you liked the post, hope the message passes and thanks for appreciating. Its heart wrenching to know that I can still write at least something which can make people feel special and think at the same time. Keep reading and writing long comments about me, makes me feel good ;-)

I would take care of the grammatical mistakes from next time, probably time to start proof reading my work.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Megha

Where you have been for so long lady? Ping me next time when you are online. I missed writing too on this space. Its good to be back.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Manjari

Lol, i hope people suffering from the side effects of 498a will spare you :P

Take care,

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Siddhesh

Time to get the eye sight checked dude, there is no pointer on the front page which can make you believe the post is not from a male unless you come from other blog making an assumption about me and eccentricities associated with this blog.

To answer your question about why this blog is mushy, i would like to ask you a few questions -

why you are wearing a hat in the display pic? why you have so many multiple blog? why are you not organized to write on one blog? Are you put off by the mush on the blog or jealous by how well the blog is written? Why in the first place you are not sure about whether you want to appreciate the "good post" or was it just an after thought not to offend me?

To end, everyone has its own strengths and limitations. Hope you get the drift. Don't tell me what i should write on my blog. I know what i am doing and how i am doing it.

Good luck,

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Rishi

thank you very much :)


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Vinnie

Hey, look who is back here! Gosh, its so long we talked. Great to have you back on the blog. Got your mail and replied it too.

Stay in touch,

Hopeless Romantic said...


Thanks buddy :)

Take care,

Hopeless Romantic said...

@Jaunty Anima

Thanks a ton, glad you liked it.


Hopeless Romantic said...


Hmm……I hope it makes a difference at least to the people who are reading this.


Hopeless Romantic said...


Thanks a lot, good to see you here. I have not written for the past 4 months, So I guess you have not missed much.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Siddesh

You have answered things yourself, I don't need to reply really. But for formality purposes, let me clarify. You INDEED judged the blog/post by reading one article including the personality of the author of the blog and then you have the GUTS to accept that too above. Just shows your shallow understanding of people and how do u judge them so quickly without even giving a thought.

You still haven't got the "drift"! I didn't expected or wanted the answers from you for those questions. All i was pointing towards the fact is that you have ABSOLUTELY no business to tell me what i should write on my OWN blog. Just the way you didn't liked when i told you about your multiple blogs. And BTW, i did go through your blogs and then i commented - it seems for every one new thought, you have one new blog !!! And this is what i meant by ORGANISATION, you can easily reduce your numbers of blogs by segregating your thoughts. But that is my opinion, which you do not need to follow. In the similar way, i do not need to follow your suggestions or give you any kind of explanations about what style i should look to write.

Advertised for the female population, WTF was that. I have absolute no idea from where you are coming from on this. It again reiterates my point that you have carried pre conceived notions about either me or the blog. You have hardly concentrated on the hidden message behind the story (mainly because you hardly bothered to read it in the first place) and was more interested in making personal jibes at me.

So called self proclaimed critics should hardly bother anyone because there was no scope of "critical analysis" in your comment. All i can see is an attempt to deride the content of the post and the blog, just because it doesn't suit your sensibilities. you need to provide BACKUP to the points you say. Don't put your comments here just for the sake of it.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Netika

you will never learn by being defensive, i was just highlighting one of the point of view which could have been felt in such a case. Hope all izzz well :D


Netika Lumb said...

Baba, I was saying, usually when people get suggestions from other bloggers, they get defensive.. You did not. You infact, took it positively.. :)

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Netika

Areee, i also said the same thing. If you are defensive (and not positive), you will not learn. Where was the confusion :P :D


Minstrel Incognito said...

I like your's well-written (apart from the lil grammar mistakes but well that part has been cleared already I see so I wont point it out again!)

The build-up to the climax was amazing..Interesting concept! :)

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Minstrel Incognito

welcome to my space, Thank you very much !! first comment here, hope to see more of you! I loved the long list of books in your profile.


menseekjustice said...

Love , family , trust faith all go out of the door with days if marraige these days . What remains is 498A( anti dowry law) , DV Act , Multiple maintenance cases , Child custody cases ,and decades loing running Divorce cases. The person on the receiving end is always the Husband . Do you know that
1) Women cannot be legally punished for adultery in India , even in 2010 because of a law created in 1856 ?

2) 98% of all dowry cases and over 80% of domestic voilence cases are false.

3) Over 56000 husbands are driven to suicide every year in a country that still fraudulently claims that women are opressed.( . Indian men also have a life expectency which is 2 years less than Indian women.

4) Indian men are responsible for their current state , they are the ones who are brought up thinking that they are the ones who dominate the society . (

5) Over Rs 11,000 crores are spent annually for women and girl child . Rs 0 is spent on men and the boy child by the government.

6) Over 13 laws exist to safeguard women and not a single law exists to safeguard men.

sweeliee said...

i m visiting ur site for the first time!! and totally loving it..the story line is so sensitive and thoughtful.
keep writing!! :)

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Menseekingjustice

Thanks a ton for providing all those detail statistics. I am very well aware of such analysis, and this was one of the main reason why it decided to write a story based on it. Everyone should have a look at these statistics and be aware of them. The laws surely needs to be changed and made more appropriate.


Hopeless Romantic said...

@ Sweeliee

Hey, welcome to my blog. Thanks for dropping by and following the blog. Glad you liked it.

See you around,

CruiserDeep said...

The first time I seeing acceptance(apparently) for Men's issues... may its your effort in humanising the statistics by slowly building up a personal tragedy.... thats what great story tellers do. But did the message stay with the readers, or did they feel good about the fiction and miss the point altogether!?.

Anyway as I said this is the first time I am seeing some acceptance towards Men's issues, and for that.... Hats Off bro.

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ CruiserDeep

I am no social activist neither i pretend to be. You can't really expect radical changes in the society against 498a just based on one post. My aim was to let people know other side of the coin by writing a fiction based on personal relationships. How much they have been influenced is something which is very difficult for me to answer. However, i do know from some of the responses offline that people actually come to know first time that these kind of statistics. I would say, i am targeting awareness more than a radical change

Keep spreading the word,

CruiserDeep said...

I know that opinion creation against the propaganda machine which has Man as the favourite whipping boy is a daunting task. But what Iam surprised about is that readers are not getting offended and turning this post into a girls versus boys fight, at the very first sight of it(like it happens usually, without even considering that Men too get victimised in substantial numbers).

We were actually looking for stories like this to make plays, short films and documentaries for awareness of these issues, which are not only affecting men but entire families, which includes women(around 28 percent of the total arrested in IPC 498a is women themselves, that too without any investigation or evidence!), minor children and senior citizens.

If you want to research more(1000s) real life case histories of such victimised families you can read and also read WHO, US and Canadian Government warnings to their citizens against the misuse of these so-called women-protection laws(which implicate/arrest more women than other IPC crimes)here:

Hopeless Romantic said...

@ CruiserDeep

I have been writing such kind of socially relevant stories for some time now. So, i can safely say that most of my readers expect a certain maturity from the write ups. You also need to give credit to the young generation of people who if properly guided will take the awareness about the issue very seriously, thereby increasing chances of such cases being less coming into light. Even though I know practically situation can be a little different – but then you need to make an effort first to bring it out. I may write more on this topic, if time permits.

If you are looking to use my short story into any form of creative work – be it play, short films or documentary, I am more than willing to allow it (off course with due permission and related procedures).You can drop me a mail for any necessary details on I will be looking forward to read more on your blogs and your appropriate response for the same.